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  • Writer's pictureTori Smith


Pregnant women – they are so emotional, so sensitive, so dramatic, so hormonal. They’ll cry over anything. Their behaviour is laughable, irrational, pathetic. This is a popular cultural narrative, how women are frequently portrayed in movies and television shows it’s annoying, it’s inaccurate, and it needs to stop. Like, yesterday.

We women – not just pregnant women – need to be bold enough to stand in our emotional power. To be energetically and emotionally attuned is a feminine strength that is amplified in pregnancy. Pregnancy will shift you emotionally, whether the effect is subtle or volcanic. You do not need to suppress it or laugh it off or apologize or make excuses. Instead, treat it as the gift that it is, lean into it and own it. This is an evolutionary response for a procreator and it stems from the protective instinct we have for our offspring. We want to broadly identify and analyze every potential threat to our child’s optimal chances at thriving. That can manifest in emotional surges in response to a variety of things in your environment. For some, it is lashing out at your partner. While this may seem comical or cruel, on a deeper level it can be understood as a call to hold our parenting partners to the highest possible standard. We expect the best from them, now more than ever, because we inherently want the best care for our children.

There can be many other displays of emotion. For myself, I remember watching the news one day during my pregnancy, and crying ever so wholeheartedly. My knee-jerk reaction was that I was a silly pregnant girl blubbering away over any little thing because of those darn hormones. But I quickly corrected that thought pattern, and recognized that I was watching a news story about a horrific mass shooting that specifically targeted LGBTQ people. Nothing about it was unworthy of my tears. The difference was that I wasn’t as shut off as I might have been on another given day. I had encountered equally horrific stories in the news before and have since that day; at times I have cried in response, but many other times I manage to maintain a sense of distance and composure. It’s not right or wrong, it’s just how I cope with the onslaught of tragic stories we all face as consumers of global news. The point is that the emotions flowing through you during pregnancy are not nothing. There can be deep sadness and grief and disappointment. There can be minor annoyances and moodiness too. Remember that you are in a period of adjustment brimming with a high sense of responsibility. You will be grappling with what you can and can’t control as you try to prepare the best environment for your baby to enter into.

There is a mental softening and opening occurring in pregnancy that mirrors your physical body’s preparation for birth. Practice allowing this. I cried watching happy commercials and listening to love songs as well. (Tell me, truly, can anyone really listen to Remember When by Alan Jackson without turning into a puddle?). Still, I firmly hold that this doesn’t make me the silly or irrational pregnant woman that society makes me out to be. My capacity for love was expanding. I was connected to a greater Mother Spirit – to creation, to all the mothers that came before me. I felt the preciousness and the delicateness of the circle of life, our short time on Earth and our place within it. I felt big feelings because that is what you are supposed to feel when you’re tuned in to your procreative power. It is no small thing, so don’t shrink yourself, don’t douse yourself and don’t run from your feelings.

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Tori Smith
Tori Smith
Oct 18, 2020

Try not to worry too much. Every experience is so unique. Some women feel much better than normal during and after pregnancy. And there's lots you can do to manage it. But it's always okay to ask for supports along the way too! Wishing you all the best when that time comes for you.


Anastasia Klironomos
Oct 17, 2020

I have really bad anxiety and sometimes panic attacks. Aswell as slight depression and I’m so worried about how Bad it might be mentally before during or after.

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